One year ago...

Ok, Ok. So it was slightly more than one year ago. It was October 2, 2009 to be exact. The most ecstatic day! I "felt" pregnant. Well, let's face it, as pregnant as i'll ever feel. {insert: stop telling me i'll get knocked up once we adopt. Isn't happening. My eggs are fried. Hard as rocks. Sperm can't get through. I think i might carry around copies of my report from the embryologist so when someone says that to me, i can hand them a shortened version. If i had a dollar for every time someone said that, i would be paying cash for my first born as opposed to working extra hours and taking out bank loans}. I digress.

On that very day, we got a call and email from our social worker that we officially became active and could start the potentially long and grueling wait for our baby to find us.

We didn't think it would take a year. Seriously. What were we thinking? That we are god's gift to a birth mother? There are so many fabulous families waiting to adopt. So we did our thing, lived life and made plans. We had our ups and downs, good times and bad.

Then we get the dreaded email on August 16th, 2010 informing us we had about a month to the expiration of our homestudy. ::gulp:: $800 more, and more meetings and more waiting. New doctors notices, new background checks, new financials and new child abuse clearances.

{September rolls around and knowing our life, our attitude is such that we'll pay the dough and we'll get matched. Still waiting, but it's all good}.

We had our meeting with our social worker and it was really a great meeting. I wanted to update you all. I wish i could carry her around in my pocket. Seriously. She is amazing and wonderful and just gets it. She mentioned that she felt the 17-20 times our profile has been out seems like a low number. Really? To me it seemed like a lot and i'm going to keep thinking that. {as a note, 17 was the number i got at our 10 month check-in with the agency. I haven't called since}. She also asked us if we wanted additional information that we might not know about, that had happened over the year. We said "sure!" She told us that 2 birth mothers loved us. Fell in love through our profile. Loved our photos, our story and our family. One decided to parent before they called us {thank god} and the other was so young her parents stepped in. So, third one's a charm? Maybe?

So, with October 2, 2010 coming and going, we are beyond waiting a year. We are 3 years past trying to have a family and we are plenty of tears, emotions and questions beyond this part of our life. We wait with open arms and big hearts.