One week down... one to go!

1.26.2009

i can't believe i am in this horrid 2 week wait again. Talk about testing my patience and the urge to not want to POAS! Seriously! LOL Christopher won't allow it. Really, the doctor doesn't want me to either. I guess i get tired of playing reverse psychology with myself. I think, well if i think i'm not pregnant hard enough, then i'll get my mind in that frame, then the bad news won't come as much of a blow to me. But, that goes against everything that i have been spiritually training my mind to do - keeping a healthy, positive outlook on this process without getting my hopes up. Thank goodness i am super busy this week and it is taking my mind off of everything! With phantom symptoms and all, i wonder pretty much every minute of everyday. Good lord, too bad i can't have a martini. :-)

2 comments:

MarcyIam said...

Isn't it so hard not to read into everything? And while you want to remain positive, you also have to balance out it and keep it real that it may not have worked just so it won't crush you as much. Such a fine line!

I don't think I'm going to POAS either, but then again, I may chnage my mind come 2/02 - just so I'll have some sort of idea since I'll be at work when I get the results. I hate crying there!

ladyred said...

good luck to you.. i just posted a new comment. AF is on her way. I just know it. The intuition of a woman with 15 BFN under her belt. The timing is all the same and so is my body acting the way it has. I am crushed.

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